Locust!!

A couple of years ago I read all the Little House books with my oldest two children.  I'm not sure which book it is in - but in one of them a big swarm of locust (or grasshoppers) come and eat all the crops - they totally wiped out everything.  How devastated these families must have been!
"And I will restore to you the years that the locust has eaten" (Joel 2:25)  This is a verse I have claimed over and over again for the past almost 7 years.  Abuse and Neglect were my sons locust and they ate a lot the first years of his life before we knew him.  We have seen the effects and my heart has cried many times, many times I have prayed "please restore what the locust has eaten."

About a week and a half ago was "Novemberfest in our town.  This is a time of year my kids really look forward to.  One of the local churches bring in all kinds of carnival rides and it’s like a street fair.  The kids get arm bands and they can ride as many rides as they like.  My two youngest wanted to ride the Ferris wheel -- I hate heights -- always have.  So my hubby was standing in line with the two of them - when they reached the top of the line the man said "only 2 riders per cart"  everyone looked at me. I took a deep breath, told myself to put my big girl panties on, smiled and got beside my son and said "I'll ride with you".  Now please understand - this is a carnival Ferris wheel - it swayed every time you moved - it was horrible!  My heart was in feet and I was just trying to maintain a look of a calm, sane person.  Up, up we went and my son started moving around pointing at everything "look mama" I could hardly breathe the cart was swaying to and fro and all I could say was "Baby could you sit still please"  He looked at me and said "are you scared?"  Now - do I really want to tell him I'm scared - but how do I hide it - the truth is -- I am terrified. "Yes baby, Mommy doesn't really like heights - just sit still for me okay"  Then he looked at me kind of like I was stupid and said "well if you were scared why did you get on?"  "I got on because you wanted to ride"  All of the sudden you could see the dots in his little head connecting..."You got on so I could ride, even though you are so scared?"  "Yes baby - Mommy loves you and you really wanted to ride"  My son then did something amazing -- he reached over and touched my white knuckles (because they were grasping the bar so tightly J) and said "I'll sit really still Mommy" and he did.

Now the amazing thing about this is that last year if he knew I was scared he would have found reasons to move because it would have been funny - he would have had the power - he chose to show me compassion.  The other amazing thing is he was able to recognize that I made a sacrifice for him because I love him and he was able to receive that love.

God is restoring what the locust has eaten....

Those of you that know my family personally know that my son is having a tough time presently medically.  He has been in the hospital for about a week now with low lung function, but I guess that would be my next blog....

Happy Thanksgiving to all of you and yours!

Dancing through a field of locusts who are losing their power,

Amy

impossibilities??

Sometimes all that is needed is a small sliver of a chance & the impossible proves to be possible.

Enough said.

Dancing in the possibilities,

Amy

OH NO!!!!

I know - two posts in 24 hours is a lot -- but my heart is so grieved this morning.  Our adoption support group is in trouble.  The Sylvia Thomas Center for Adoptive & Foster Families has played an intrical role in keeping our family together.  I have not shared many things that have happened in our home on this blog because I do not know how much a person who is not in the same situation would understand - so you get a taste of our lives -- but not the full course.  I will tell you this - the last 6 years have been a nightmare at times.  I have not known how to cope with some of the violence that comes along with a severely mentally ill child.  But there was someone who understood - The Sylvia Thomas Center.  They have been there for me in so many ways.  They have provided emotional support of other parents going through similar situations.  They have provided my stable children with outlets more times than I can count.  They have brought a behaviorist into our home that we never could have afforded.  Not just any behaviorist - a great behaviorist - one who thoroughly understands RAD and what it can do to a family.  They provided a therapist for my youngest child who desperately needed to work out anxiety issues while not understanding her emotions.  She loves her brother but was afraid.  They helped her.  They provided me with extra eyes in the summer time sending an intern to my house 3 times a week during the summer months when my RAD child had to be in line of sight at all times.  They provided case management by developing safety plans and always being supportive and nonjudgmental.  I cannot tell you the number of times I have sat in Sharon Due's office in tears because I simply did not know what to do.  She provided a listening ear, a hug & real world solutions.  For a couple of years when times were really tough financially they provided Christmas for my children - all my children - not just the adoptive one.  They have helped me get my son into a facility when it seemed impossible to do so because he has both a mental illness and a physical illness.  They helped monitor the facility.  When the Department of Children and Families got involved in our case - they were there to vouch for us and say that we were good parents.  They have done this for countless families.  They provided all this at no cost to me.  I can honestly say if it were not for the Sylvia Thomas Center it would not be likely that our family would still be together.

Now the Children's Board of Hillsborough County wants to cut funding to the Sylvia Thomas Center.  Countless families will be affected.  Countless families will separate and children will go back into foster care when there is no support for the parents and families.  My heart is so sad.  Below is the news article:

http://www.wtsp.com/news/topstories/article/202227/250/Budget-cuts-to-affect-post-adoption-agency

I ask you - if you live in Hillsborough County or if you are the parent of foster or adoptive child to write the Children's Board and tell them how important the Sylvia Thomas Center and agencies like them are.  Ask them to not cut the funding.  E-mail your letters to Sharon Dues <sdues@sylviathomascenter.org> and she will forward them to the Children's Board.

Dancing in Sadness,

Amy